Recently I spoke with an employee group as part of an educational enrichment program attended by parents of high school and college-age students. We talk about the classic nuts and bolts, managing deadlines, scheduling campus visits, the application processes, and how to pay for college. All are part of the responsibilities parents must oversee as they navigate selecting their students (families) right education pathway after high school.
As the meeting started to break up, a few parents voiced their frustration, some even saying they might have a better chance throwing a lucky penny into a fountain than getting their kids into school and being able to afford it. I looked at the session organizer and asked if we could extend the lunch and learn for those who wanted to continue.
For the next twenty minutes, we discussed the importance of planning, with a twist – it’s time to understand and recognize the wild vortexes families can get drawn into, willingly and unknowingly – why – because we allow ourselves. Parents must rethink their approach to education, work, and careers after high school by first accepting that the system has created some significant pitfalls.
Six Vortexes To Avoid
- Emotions – we hope we follow a natural thought process. Still, once our son or daughter gets their hope up, it becomes emotionally driven, and things like the right choice and our financing capabilities get thrown out the window.
- Financing Realities – after purchasing a home, investing in college is the most expensive life change event in a family’s life. So why do educators, financial planners, and other advisers position families to focus on paying for college incorrectly? Knowing if we can afford the cost is paramount to how we help our students find their authentic education path in high school. Financing first – shopping for the beautiful campus is second.
- Vanity and Prestige – for some psychological reason, we worry about what our neighbors, relatives, and friends think about the choices we hope our students (family) will make. Are they paying the bill? Are they losing sleep over the agonizing process? Do they really know your student – truly. Or is it some misguided reality game we are allowing ourselves to be playing? Why?
- First Generation – like having a child (I have four), first-time high school and college-age families have questions and need help. Even if you are a veteran college parent, without practical and experienced-based guidance, you can get overwhelmed with stress and anxiety. Always ask why? How come, and can you help me? Knowledge is power!
- Poor Communication – there is a massive gap in the flow of information. School systems expect students to communicate vital information to their parents – NOT! Parents with questions or inquiries must seek answers, not wait for meetings. Living in the dark is another primary source of stress and anxiety.
- Peer Pressure – what 17-year-old will raise their hand and proclaim, no, I’m not following the herd; I’m going to do my way? Education to career planning post-high school is no longer a one-fits-all process. Helping students step out of social media’s shadows and peer pressure to find their authentic self takes courage. Celebrate the student-athlete, the skilled trade professional, the academic dancer, and the community college learner on the same level.
Starting Point – Just One
- Goals and Expectations – if you are a parent of a high school student and have not discussed four critical topics, then get at it – start helping them shape their future – ask:
- What are your strengths, skills, and experiences – in and out of school
- Who do you balance a checkbook, calculate compounding interest and be financially literate
- What are you interested in, values, hobbies, ideas, and the occasional job, and
- What do they like their life to look like? What hopes, dreams, and lifestyle preferences
We ended the intense and highly energetic session with the need to keep talking. Everyone had to go back to work. I shared my number – the office door is always open.
A reminder – this is an emotional process with many peaks and valleys for their students and themselves. And yes (I beat a dead horse), proper planning and asking (not waiting) for guidance, advice, and help will make the journey much more enjoyable.
Ben Franklin once said, “Failing to prepare is planning to fail” The college search, selection, and payment process can be a long, sometimes consuming experience. Understanding the twist and turns, rules of the road, and how they apply to you and your students are crucial to surviving the journey. Need help with your plan? Schedule a free consultation to learn how we are helping students and parents. Text or call 617-240-7350 or email tom@getcollegegoing.com. Learn more at www.getcollegegoing.com
Our four pillars at Get College Going: find the right education pathway, for the right reason, at the right school, at an affordable cost